I have really gotten out of my routine over the last few weeks. I hate it when I do that.
I am now in Joshua with my Daily Audio Bible reading. God tells Joshua not to worry or be afraid. He is told to DO as he is told and GOD will protect and provide all that is needed. Why is it we question everything God tells us even when we have seen first hand so many things God has done in the past? I wish I could learn not to question and just to trust. What does it take for me to know. I have seen His miracles first hand over and over in my life. Yet I still question what He is doing.
Life gets so very busy. I have three children. David is 20, Daniel is 17 and Jannine is 10. You would think that because they are older it wouldn't be so difficult. However, I am finding now that they are older it is more difficult. David has a job in Venice and a precious girl friend. However, I worry about him when he is traveling around, especially coming home from work late at night. Daniel has school at the high school, a technical school, online school and a job. I worry about him driving around. I am concerned that he get all his school work done. I try and keep up with where he is and what he is doing. Then there is Jannine. She is still little and I have her at home, but she too is getting busier all the time. They are no longer safe and secure in their rooms during the day and night. Many days I am left here with three dogs and no children like today. I don't feel ready to be home alone. I feel like there should be little children running around again. However, with my back as bad as it is, I know I couldn't do it. I try and keep busy with school and various projects just to keep my mind busy.
When things are too quiet I begin thinking about bills that I cannot pay. I worry about meals that I need to prepare. I worry that logisticly everyone is where they need to be with a vehicle or arrangment to make it back home. I know I shouldn't worry as I mentioned earlier. But I am human and I do!
Currently we are waiting for our IRS refund. I am waiting for my disability. We are waiting for a solution about our home that we owned. We are waiting to hear what is going to happen in the home we are living in. So much waiting ... so many worries ... so much out of my complete control. Our refund has been delayed because of an incorrect entry of an IRS worker. I have called almost daily to no avail. They just don't care. We did our taxes back in February and I was supposed to receive the money within 21 days. It's been over eight weeks now ... I still have no idea when or if we will get the refund. I was counting on that money to pay some bills and get caught up. UGH!
So, since I have no control I just must wait and pray. God knows exactly what is going to happen... I don't! So I try not to worry. I try to just pray and give it to God. Through all the financial worries we continue to tithe because we are instructed to do so. I felt very convicted about this issue in January. I have fallen regarding my Bible study and time and blogging. But the tithing has not stopped or been missed.
Proberbs 12: 26 says A righteous man is careful in dealing with his neighbor. But the ways of the wicked lead him astray. In spite of all the worry and stress. I have to be careful how I deal with things. I can't get angry. I can't get depressed and roll into a ball and hide. I just have to give it ALL to GOD and trust. Proverbs 3: 5 & 6 says Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart. Lean not unto your own understand. In ALL your ways acknowledge HIM and HE will direct your paths.
Remember to stop and enjoy the blessings. Don't miss anything that God has for you today and everyday. And remember to be tender to being USED of God today. Maybe someone just needs a smile or a hug from you. A kind word uttered from you might change someone's world. Be the light in a very dark world.
God bless and have a great day! <3
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