January 31, 2013

Today is the last day of January 2013.  I can't believe month one is already finished.  Time sure is flying by.  Today is my niece Megan's 16th birthday.  She is such a beautiful young lady.  I wish I could spend time with her but she lives up north so I have to be satisfied with Facebook and Skype visits.  It's amazing how time flies.  Today is the last day my oldest will be a teenager.  He turns 20 tomorrow!  How did that happen?  Where has the time gone?

My reading today was in Joshua.  One of my favorite verses is Joshua 1: 9.  Have I not commanded you?  "Be strong and courageous.  Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."  I am so thankful that no matter what happens, God is always with us.  As my children grow, I am often frightened of getting older and them leaving me.  But I know that I must be courageous and know that God is with me in each phase of my life.  What is our purpose in life?  I am a friend, daughter, cousin, mother, wife, sister, aunt... is that my only purpose?  I have a purpose that God has for me.  I don't know what the purpose is all the time, but I try to seek God's voice and do His will in all that I do and say.  What is the call God has on your life and mine?  Galatians 2:20 says, I have been cruicified with Christ.  It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.  And the life I now live in the flesh I live by fiath in the Son of God, who lvoed me and gave himself for me. 

I am in awe of people like Jen and Barry.  They are related to my nephew in love and have been called to the mission field.  They are leaving this summer, July 29  to go and minister to mormans in Salt Lake City, Utah!  They inspire me in so many ways. They have a blog where you can follow them, financially support them and most of all PRAY for them as God leads them in this way.  http://utahbound.wordpress.com/2013/01/23/july29th/  They have found God's purpose for their lives.  It has been amazing to watch from the outside and see how God is working everything out for this ministry and direction for their lives. 



Enjoy the beautiful day that God has created for YOU and for ME!  Stop and enjoy the blessings, big and small.  Make somebody smile today!  Be a blessing!  And remember we are children of the King!  Find your purpose for today.  What does God want you to do today?  Maybe someone needs a hug.  Maybe someone needs a friend to pray with.  Maybe someone needs their mailbox put up today.  Just, stop and take the time to make a difference.  Be a missionary right where you are.  Spend time doing what God wants you to do and do it courageously!  He is with you in all that you do!



January 30, 2013

Happy Wednesday ... today I took Daniel and Jannine to school.  I love spending time with them.  I am so blessed.  They are good kids, all three of them. 

After taking everyone to school I headed to Jackie's to hang out for the day.  She is getting better each and every day.  We went to the doctor, pharmacy and then back home where we had some lunch.  We don't even turn on the tv when we are together.  We just visit and catch up! 

Today's Bible reading was in Nehemiah 1: 4-11 speaking again about prayer.  God wants us to spend time with Him each and every day.  I love spending time with my children, husband and friends as He loves us spending time with Him.  He wants us to sit in front of the fireplace with our Bibles open and just talk to Him.  Catch up with Him on what we are doing, thinking and feeling!  He is our Father, our friend, our provider and confidant.  He loves us!  I know most of the time what my kids are doing.  I often drive them to various activities and read about happenings on their Facebook pages.  But, I still LOVE listening to them tell me from their point of view what is happening in their world.  God knows what we are doing each day.  He knows before we know.  But He still loves hearing from us.  When we make mistakes we need to ask His forgiveness.  When things go well we need to Praise Him and thank Him!  Verse 11 says, O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.  We need to communicate with God on a daily and sometimes minute by minute basis. 

We need to walk in the truth.  Do not live by feelings or your own insight because they lead you in the wrong direction.  My favorite verse is Proverbs 3: 5 & 6 ... we must trust in the Lord with all our heart and lean NOT unto our own understanding.  In all our ways acknowledge HIM and HE will direct your paths. 

Tonight Jeff, Jannine and I had to attend a EAA meeting for elections.  I was voted as the chapter Secretary.  I am honored to hold this position and work with some incredible people who have amazing stories to tell.  I love doing these activities because it keeps me busy.  It is a night once a month that I get to spend time with my husband as well. 

On our way home we saw the most beautiful moon.  God created that sight for us.  We had a plan to go to the ice cream store on the way home.  But a construction worker had cut a gas line installing some equipment.  A large firetruck blocked our bath and we had to adjust our travels to get around the danger in the road.  Eventually we got to the ice cream store safetly.  But it just was another visual aid that reminded me that sometimes things happen that change our direction.  It doesn't mean we aren't going to get to where we were headed but God has another path He wants us to take and we need to just CALMLY follow His direction.  He has the rewards at the end and He will keep us safe!

Have a great day!  God bless.

January 28, 2013

It is a beautiful Monday morning.  Jannine and Daniel have left for school, David has left for work and I am here with the three doggies.  I guess I like the quiet time sometimes, but I am not a person to be alone for long.  I like the noise and activity.  I usually have the tv on just to have some noise in the background.  I am not sure why that is, I guess it is just me!

My Bible study today talked about prayer time.  In Matthew 6:7-13 it says, "And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words.  Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.  Pray then like this: "Our Father in heaven, hallowed by your name.  Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debters.  And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. 

When I talk to God, I try to imagine I am just talking to my Daddy.  Don't get me wrong, I have complete reverence and respect for Him.  But I know that He loves me and sometimes I just cry out to Him.  Other times I praise in the blessings and other times I just talk.  I have even yelled a couple of times... which I don't recommend.  However, I am human and have done it a couple times.  Sometimes I think God has forgotten me, but really I know that He has everything under control.  We need to remember who's will we are to accomplish.  I need to remind myself that I need to do HIS will even when it isn't always what I want to do. 

I am going to head over to my friends house who is recovering from surgery.  I am going to take her to the doctor, we are going to have lunch and just enjoy our friendship God has blessed us with.  So, I look forward to the blessings God has planned for me today.  I'll write more when I return.

January 29, 2013

Today was a beautiful Tuesday in sunny Florida.  I spent another wonderful day with my friend helping her as she heals from surgery.  I cherrish this time with her and her beautiful family.  Today we decided to have supper together with the kids and our husbands.  So, I picked Jannine up from school and she was so excited to come and hang out with us girls.  Jackie had a little scrap booking kit for her to do.  She put it all together ready for pictures she will take when her Ya Ya (Grandma) comes in less than two weeks for a quick visit. 

When we were almost ready to eat we walked into the back yard and looked at the beautiful scenery.  They live on a canal and have several banana palms in the back yard.  I had no idea that bananas really grew on banana palms, but they do! 

As I watched our son Daniel step out on the dock and take it all in, I was reminded again how important it is to STOP and just enjoy the beautiful things around us. 

Life isn't all bad.  I took some amazing pictures in just one tiny place on earth that God created.  I watched Jackie's two boys and my one son talk together with their Dad's like grown men.  I remember when we worried that they might get to playing and fall into the very same creek just a few short years ago!  Oh how I cherrish those memories.  But, I am enjoying this phase of my life too.  Oh it comes with aches and pains and disappointment too.  But there are no more diapers, no more nap times to work around and not as many sleepless nights.  I love talking to my children and watching them develop into the young men and young lady that God has created them to be.  I am thankful God entrusted them to me and hope I didn't make too many mistakes along the way. 

I was reading into todays devotion Matthew 6:7-13 just as I read yesterday.  It talks about when we pray not to just say empty phrases.  We are to pray about actual things and talk to God as our Father.  I pray for my three children.  I pray that God will protect them and that they will allow Him to lead them as they move on this pathway called life.  I pray that God will give me guidance as to how to help them, peace to let them go as I need to, and unconditional love as He gives me to care for them no matter what they do or say.  I pray that God's will is always honored and done, I pray for God's daily provision for all of our family and friends, I pray that my children will forgive others including me when I make mistakes, and I pray that they will resist temptation and keep their eyes focussed on God and GOD alone!

As it says in Deuteronomy 6:4-6 - I pray that my husband, children and I will always love the Lord with all our hearts, soul and might so that we will always obey His commands and stay tender to His leading in all we do, say or think.

Stop, smell the roses ... enjoy even the little things God is doing.  Because if we don't appreciate the little things how can we enjoy the big things?  We might miss it if we don't!  I want the best God has for me!
Go make it a great day!  God bless you.

January 27, 2013

Wow, what a wonderful day it was today.  We started the day going to Church at Fellowship Bible Church of Venice.  Pastor John Meyer is such a great teacher.  I always enjoy his messages.  I love that his messages are recorded and can be found at www.fbcov.org so that I can often go back and review.  Check it out and see the wonderful messages we hear each week.  If you don't have a church, please feel free to join us each Sunday at 10am for Church and 11am for Sunday school.  The children's program called Quest runs from 10:30am until 12pm.

Pastor John finished up a message he started last week in Hebrews 10.  Don't drive, don't doubt, don't become dull  and don't despise.  Oh, how often I have done all of those things.  Hebrews 10: 26 talks about if we deliberately sin after getting saved, then we should be fearful of judgement and the fury of fire.  We are supposed to have a changed heart.  We are to long after the Lord and want to be in His will.  Of course this doesn't happen over night, but we are supposed to try and live right.  I get angry sometimes and am hurt when someone "wrongs" me.  But God says in verse 30 For we know his who said, "Vengeance is mine; I will repay."  The Lord is in control and HE will judge His people!  That makes me think as a parent who I want to correct my children.  I don't want others or the siblings correcting each other.  The Lord says, the same thing that HE will do the correction!  We need to just worry about keeping ourselves in line, that is a big enough job. 

After Church we headed back to Englewood, delivered children home and then headed back to Sarasota.  Today's is Curt Ross' 50th surprise birthday party.  Jeff, Jannine, Shannon and I ran a bunch of errands and prepared for the party.  I love spending time with the Ross/Eskew families.  What a precious time ... just appreciating the time we ahve been given together to celebrate the milestones. 

I realize that so many times in life, times are so hard and there often seems like there is no hope for tomorrow.  One of the things I challenged myself in blogging for the new year, was to appreciate the little things or miracles each day.  Today was filled with amazing miracles and such joy.  In Church Pastor John mentioned if a quote from a missionary.  He said basically that if a man holds on to earthly things so that he will survive, but in doing so lets go of heavenly things ... is it worth it?  We shouldn't be earthly minded, but instead, heavenly focussed.  Today brought me so much joy spending time with my church family and our earthly family.  There were several generations there tonight.  Grandma Ross and Grandma Eskew ... are two Godly women who have not had an easy life but have never lost focus on God!  They raised their families along with their husbands to love the Lord.  They have both been blessed with a long life so that they may now enjoy their children, their grandchildren and now their great grand children.  There were two precious little baby girls there tonight, 4 and 9 months old.  They brought so much joy to everyone there.  There is nothing like the smell and smile of a little child.  I just really love being with family.  Those times are so precious ... moments in time to be cherrished. 

Happy Birthday Curt!  We love you and Shannon and thank God for your continued testimony.  May God bless you with at least 50 more wonderful years!

I am thankful for the precious time with wonderful people God has placed in our lives.  It is wonderful to see so many people who love the Lord and to witness all He has done in so many lives.  Thank you for the wonderful and beautiful day.  Thank you for recharging my batteries Lord.  Thank you for loving me. 

January 26, 2013

Happy Saturday morning.  Today we have nothing planned which is a beautiful thing for the day. Unfortunately, it is yet another Saturday of no work for my husband.  But, God is in control and I know He will take care of us.  He hasn't worked any Saturdays since 2013 began.  I have enjoyed the time with him, but it makes money even tighter.  God has been blessing us in spite of the lack of work.  It has been a daily miracle to watch.  I was convicted this year to begin tithing again.  God has blessed us so much since we have been tithing.  I am learning this year to obey God and He will bless above and beyond what we can imagine.

John 15:12-13 says, This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.  Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 

Jesus spent time along with His Father!  How much more should we spend time with our Father as well?  We need to get away from the earthly things on a daily basis and remember why we are here.  We need to focus on the heavenly view for a little while each and every day so we are renewed.  Ephesians 5:16 says, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil! 

I can do nothing without God each and every day.  We are to love the Lord our God!  Deuteronomy 6:4-6 says Hear O Israel:  The Lord our GOd, the Lord is one.  You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart!

I love you Lord with all my heart.  Help me do your will in everything I do today.   

January 25, 2013

Today I had the wonderful opportunity to spend the day with my childhood friend.  She is recovering from gallbladder surgery and just needed someone to be with her today while her children and husband were gone all day.  I so enjoyed spending that precious time with her.  We never turned the tv on, instead we just talked together all day long.  She is such a precious friend of whom I lost contact several times over the years.  I am glad to be reconnected to her.  She loves the Lord with all her heart. 

My reading today was Matthew 16:13 thru Matthew 17:9.  Jesus was speaking to his disciples and in verse 24 he said, "if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.  For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.  For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?  Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?  For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done.  Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not takse death until they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom."  We are to work hard to just follow HIM!  That is stated over and over again in God's word.  We are not working toward earthly things but heavenly things!  We are to deny ourselves and follow HIM!  His burden is light!  If we lose our soul, what will it for us but send us to hell. 

Psalm 21 speaks of the Lord's strength.  After reading this how can I fear anything?  He is in charge of EVERYTHING.

In all that we do and say, we are to show God's love.  When I have the opportunity to sit with someone like Jackie and care for her I pray she see's God's love.  She has a precious husband who has always worked so hard to provide for his family.  He is a strong man.  He loves the Lord.  I pray that spending time with this family that I might show him through my weak human body that God loves him.  He is loved more than he could ever know.  His Lord loves him and has not forgotten him.  Like so many, work has been tough to get and finances have been so tight.  They have struggled much like we have.  I pray that in this time that I have been given the opportunity to spend with them, that God might use me in some way to reach the entire family.  I love all four of them with all my heart.  I just keep praying I will listen to God's leading and direction and follow through with His clear direction. 

Matthew 26:41 says Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation.  The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.  As I work hard to be more available to God's daily leading, I pray that He will keep me on the correct path and that my flesh will NOT take over.  Hebrews 12:12-13 says Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed.  Sometimes I have struggled to spend time alone with God.  Having the YouVersion and Daily Audio Bible has made that so much easier for me this year. 

Thank you Lord.  I pray that in 2013 and for the rest of my life that I will listen to You and be sensitive to all You are asking of me.  In everything, even the little things, I want to be living for You and hearing Your daily and moment by moment instructions.  I am thankful for the Daily Audio Bible and the You Version apps that have helped me gain so much more knowledge of Your Word.  I find myself in so many of the stories we are studying this year already.  Thank You so much for making me... me!  Please Lord, use me to do Your will.  I promise I will do my very best Lord to be available ... thank You God for chosing me.  I am your humble servant Lord.  I love you Lord!

Deuteronomy 6:4-6 says, hear, O Israel:  The Lord our God, the Lord is one.  You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your sould and with all your might.  And these words that I command you today shall be on your hear!  I love this verse so much!!!! 

My final verse for the day is Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to HIS PURPOSE!!!!!  I am hanging onto this promise every second of every day.  God has been working so much in the Walston home already in 2013.  I am SO excited to see what is next.  Thank you God!

January 24, 2013

Today I started by going to Myakka River Elementary and watching our baby girl Jannine sing in front of the entire school.  I found myself holding a video camera, snap shot camera and grabing my phone as well to catch the moment.  I don't want to miss a thing and want to share it with family and friends.  To say I am proud of my children ... well everyone saw it while I tried to juggle three cameras.  How much more is God proud of us when we do His will? 

Life is so tough at times.  But then there are those precious and joyous moments that we want to remember for a lifetime.  Pslam 30:5 says For his anger is but for a moment, and his favor is for a lifetime.  Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning.  God promises that even though we suffer, tomorrow will bring joy. 

Psalm 20 ... tells us to TRUST in the Name of the Lord OUR GOD!  David says may the Lord answer you in the day of trouble!  May the name of the God of Jacob protect you.  May He grant you your heart's desire and fulfill all your plans!

Proverbs 4:20- 27  God tells us to listen to His Words.  We are to guard our heart that determines the course of our life.  We are to fix our eyes on what lies before us.  We are to ponder the path of our feet; then our ways will be sure.  He tells us to not swerve to the right or the left; turn your foot away from evil. 

It is so very clear what we are to do each and every day.  We are to guard our HEARTS for it determines the course of our lives.  WOW, that is powerful.  We need to make certain our hearts are carefully guarded and protected in all we do and say. 

Deuteronomy 6:5 says You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  Verse 6 says and these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.  We are to teach these things to our children and talk of them when we are together in our homes, and when we are walking out together with others, and when we go to bed and wake the next day.  Everyone should know that we love the Lord and honor Him as they are around us and our family.  Mark 12:29-31 commands us to Love the Lord with all our heart, soul and mind.  The second greatest command is to love your neighbor as yourself. 

I ask the Lord today, "O Lord give me a heart that longs after you and a heart to serve others!"  I pray that our Children see how much we love the Lord and that they will follow after our leadership.

Have a great day everyone.  Jesus loves you!  Just love Him back. 

January 23, 2013

Today was an amazing day in so many ways.  My childhood friend was put into the hospital last night for emergency gallbladder surgery.  I had the opportunity to go to the hospital today and spend some quality time with her.  She was in so much pain.  I felt so badly for her.  I was able to help her eat her lunch.  I tried to make her feel comfortable.  I just love her so much.  She is a wonderful woman who has been through a great deal of pain.  Yet she still loves the Lord and remains sound and strong in her testimony.  She has two precious sons that are now young men.  I have watched them grow.  After spending some time with her, I headed back to Englewood to watch in the glorious move of another dear friend Debbie and her family.  She and her husband and two girls are moving back to Englewood to stay.  I am so very happy they are back and that the Lord allowed us to stay here as well.  She has a beautiful home.  There is another one just down the road that is smaller but equally beautiful.  Wow, what an awesome home it is and how wonderful it would be to live right there by her.  I am praying that God might work it out.  But I want what is best... what God has planned because it is always better that what I dream of. 

I have to admit that a tiny part of me wishes that I could have a beautiful home that was ours again.  But I don't want to feel that even for a little bit.  Psalms 103:1 Bless the Lord, Oh my soul, and all that is within me bless his holy name.  I am so blessed.  God has taken care of me and my family.  I don't want to be captive in my feelings.  I don't want to rely on my own insight.  I must believe in God's Word and His leading alone!  But, I can still dream... I can still pray and ask.  But I have to be willing to live what He directs.  I chose to serve GOD and GOD alone.  Joshua 24:15

Having the chance to spend quality time with two friends in two very different times in their lives was incredible.  With my disability, I can't do much, but I do what I can.  I try to do what God wants me to do with every day.  We have to make sure that we live the life that God demands.  We have to be careful not to let "traditions" or "rituals" that we grew up with to cloud what God is asking us to do.  I great up in a wonderful Church full of very Godly leaders.  However, they were very closed minded when it came to "different" people.  It felt as though they judged people at times.  They were not approachable at times.  I found that very sad. 

Psalm 19:13-14 I love and seemed to be appropriate to today's deeds.  Keep back your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me!  Then I shall be blameless, and innoncent of great transgressions.  Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptale in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.  I want all that I do and say be His will for me and His leading and working through me.  I am blessed to be used of God in anyway He sees fit for me. (David wrote this Psalm)

Proverbs 4:14-19 Don't do as the wicked do... don't follow the path of evil doers!  We are not hear to cause anyone to stumble.  We are to be the LIGHT ...

I want everything that I do, say and think please you.  I want you to be in all I do, think and say.  I don't want to be stuck up, or unapproachable, or "a holy roller".  I want to invite God into everything that I do.  I want to live my life in the presence of God.  It is not the rituals that matter ... It's the life you live that matters.  In everything you do, say and think ... remember GOD is with you. 

Happy 101st birthday to Grandad Essick today.  What an awesome man.  He is Donna Meadows Stewart father.  He is still healthy and amazing.  I pray that I can be healthy like he is.

I feel burdened to talk to people about the Lord.  We are not promised tomorrow.  May every day count.  Make sure those you love will be joining you in Heaven someday. 

January 22, 2013

Good Tuesday morning.  It was a rough start today as the kids had not gone to bed early enough.  So they were tired, as was I.  I couldn't get to sleep.  I had a night of thinking way to much and worrying about the letter coming today, the bills due, and on and on!

I started my day with the Daily Audio Bible.  I love this program so much.  We start by reading in Gensis, then Matthew, Psalms and Proverbs.  It is wonderful.  Brian makes the stories come to life and then reviews what we read at the end.  I love it.

Matthew 14: 13-36  This talks about the little boy with the five loaves and the two fish that then fed about five thousand men along with their wives and children.  That little bit fed everyone until they were full and still there were 14 baskets left over.  I think of that with our finances often.  God makes that little bit stretch to cover everything.  We have been tithing this year and it has been amazing how God has blessed us.  This passage also talks about Peter walking on the water and his lack of faith.  Boy, I am so often like Peter loosing my focus and starting to sink.  I cry out to God and He reaches out his hand and pulls me back up.  Why do I loose that faith?

Psalms 18: 35-50 and Proverbs 4:11-13... these scriptures show us that God has such great power to do whatever He wants.  He will work through us and He gives us all the tools we need to carry out His will.  If only we have the faith and the willingness to do what HE asks of us.  Many times we feel we aren't able to do what He has asked OR we are just not listening to what He is saying!

Life is hard.  Times are tough.  But God has a purpose for all that has happened.  Some of us had made bad choices to get us where we are.  While others, have continued to live by faith and yet life is still so hard.  Some people get angry and feel these tough times give them the right to be mad at the world and hold on to it.  Freedom is availble to all of us.  We can look at these tough times and harbor hatred and anger or we can use these times to build character.  We show God's love through tough times ... we don't have to be bitter.  Joseph should us this perfectly when his brothers sold him into slavery.  When they came to him years later and needed help, he gave it to them and loved his brothers in spite of their terrible deeds. 

Matthew 5:6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.  Colossians 3 clearly speaks about making sure we are focussed on God and God alone.  We are to put away the earthly things.  We are to stay pure and keep our focus on God alone.  We are to put away anger, malice, and slander.  We are not to talk about others and to not lie to each other!  We are to ask Him for His grace in our need to follow Him.  We are to ask Him for the grace to live in that grace.  When we take those difficult steps we will see the power of the gospel, and the power of fear will diminish with each step.  It is difficult but as we know, All things are possible with God!

Please Lord help me to use the hard times as another chapter in my testimony for you.  Life has many wonderful parts.  There have been so many wonderful joyful times in my life.  You have blessed me with so many miracles like finding my birth Mother and my wonderful siblings.  You have blessed me with a wonderful Husband and three beautiful children.  You blessed me with Parents who loved me and raised me to love you.  You have taken care of me and my family in ways I could never have imagined. 

Help me be a walking testimony to your love and your goodness.  Help me be submissive to Your will.  My goal for 2013 is to be in Your will in all I do.  I love You Lord. 

I am looking forward to the awesome things God has planned for the day ahead.  A dear friend sent me a little saying that I have pinned on my wall.  It says, When God takes something from your grasp, He is not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better.  The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.  Thank you Lord for those words of comfort!  Amen

January 21, 2013

Happy Monday morning.  Today the kids have the day off of school.  I love having them all home, safely tucked in their little beds.  I sleep so much better when they are all home.  David is 19, Daniel 17 and Jannine 10 but they are all still my babies no matter how old they are.  I have an extra child, Izabella who is 9 here for a few days.  I love having extra children around as well.

The YouVersion Fearless Bible study today takes me to Galations 5 which talks about how poor and weak we are.  Without the Lord we are NOTHING!  We cannot do God's will or carry out His plan for our lives if we don't stay connected to Him.  Colossians 3: 1 - 17 tells that If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.  Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth!  In this passage a special verse popped out at me.  Verse 12 says, Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, verse  13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgivine each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.  Verse 14 says, And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony!  Verse 17 says, And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

For some reason this brings up something that hurts my heart to the deepest point.  I have a brother that I love with all my heart.  He has always been my hero!  People in our community love him and look up to him.  For a few years he did not speak to my parents.  I was young and did not understand the problem.  Our Father died in 1990 and he did not speak to our Mother.  Then he finally reconnected to our Mom and I was so happy.  Then our Mom died in 2002 ... he was wonderful while we planned the funeral.  I felt so close to him.  We hugged at the cemetary and that is the last time I saw him ... hugged him!  Why?  A few years later I was diagnosed with a large mass on my thyroid that was thought to be cancer.  I called him thinking that maybe this would bring us together again.  He had a battle with cancer and we were very close during his fight back in 1993.  I was never so close to him as I was during that time.  We spent hours on the phone talking about the Lord and just enjoying talking.  His wife died a few years later very suddenly and sent word that I was forbidden to come to her funeral.  Why me?  He let everyone else come and has continued to speak with our other siblings but September 3, 2011 I received the most horbile letter from him.  He said he never wanted to hear from me again!  He was not my brother nor was he my friend.  Why?  I still love him and fight with myself wanting to reach out to him again at some point.  I keep praying that somehow or someway God would bring us back together.  I just want to know why ... what did I do wrong?  How can I make things right if I don't know what I have done wrong?  

Psalm 18:16-   34   tells us that God will take care of us.  We are stay focussed on Him and He will help us to do great things all through His strength. 

Proverbs 4:7-10  We are told to get wisdom; get insight; do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.  Verse 7 says the beginning of wisdom is this: get wisdom, and whatever you get, get insight.  And verse 10 says hear, my son, and accept my words, that the years of your life may be many.

Lord, please help me develop good judgement.  I don't undnrstand why this relationship has been broken for so many years between my brother and I!  I pray Lord that this relationship will be mended at some point.  I am praying for wisdome and good judgement.  I don't know if I should reach out to him or just leave him alone.  I don't want something to happen to him before we mend our relationship.  But, is it right for me to reach out, or should I just leave him alone?  I love you Lord, please give me wisdom and guidance.  My heart hurts Lord ... I love him!  Please help me Lord.  Thank you for your guidance each day and your wisdom. 

Tomorrow, I will receive a letter from the Clerk of Court.  I fear that it might be a note regarding the decision about the home here on Alexandria Avenue.  We have no place to go from here and certainly no money to rent a home.  I am trying not to fear the letter.  That might not be what the letter is at all.  Whatever the letter,  I know that God has everything under control.  God is good.  This year I have felt the need to get back to tithing again.  Our budget is so tight right now, however, since we started tithing again this year God has done some amazing things with our finances.  We own a lot over on Charlemont that we thought was gone to taxes.  But just a few days ago we got a call from the women who purchased our Charlemont home and she wants to purchase the lot.  We won't get a lot of money but will be able to pay the back taxes and get a little bit of cash as well.  Thank you God for taking care of us.  I sold three college books on line last week and was able to pay off a debt in doing that and received some money for our checking account.  I want to remember all of these things because God is in all of it!  Thank you God.  I want in 2013 to be more in tuned to YOU and do YOUR will.  I love you LORD, I trust you LORD!  Thank you Jesus!  Praise you Jesus!  Amen

January 18, 2013

Yesterday was the retirement party for Dan Jeffers, principal at LBHS.  I sat there listening to all the people who have known him, worked with him and for him and even his daughter.  There were wonderful things being said about him.  It was a wonderful time of reflection.  I kept thinking how nice it was to have people speak about him while he is alive.  The constant line of discussion between various speakers was that Dan was a man with a plan.  He is a competitor with his main focus of making a difference in the lives of youth he came in contact with.  Dan's mother was there and you could see the pride on her face.  It was such an honor to take part in the celebration.  I pray that some day I will be able to make an impact on others just as he did. 

The world as it is today often seems filled with so much sadness.  There are days I wonder if there is anyone left in the world who is good.  People like Dan Jeffers makes me realize that there are good people still left.  The gym was filled with some amazing people in our community such as, David Dignam, Mac Horton, Mike and Marcia Louden, Dan and Karen Jeffers, Bill Strickland, David Gayler, Mr. and Mrs. Morgan, Mrs. Badger, and so many others.  Each of these people had a part of who I am today.  But, really who am I?  I try hard to do good in my community and make a difference.  I keep thinking that one of these days someone will see how hard Jeff works and how hard I try to make a difference and suddenly we will catch a break.  But, in the next thought I realize that God has done so much for us.  We have a home to live in that He provided.  Jeff has a job that doesn't pay much, but has a boss who loves the Lord and loves our family.  We are rich in friends that we are blessed with.  We have three healthy and beautiful children who love the Lord.  Yet, sometimes I feel so alone!  I feel that I am not part of the "select" group.  I feel like an outsider.
Why are some chosen and others igorned?  The people I mentioned are wonderful and deserve all they have.  But why are some ignored or unappreciated?  Why do we continue to struggle?  I guess it is wrong to feel that way.  It certainly isn't the right attitude to have I know.  But I am human and often wonder why life is so tough.  How am I such an active part of my community, yet feel like an outcast in various situations.  I am often called on as a "worker bee" but then not part of the celebration.  I wonder how often I have made God feel like that in my life?

Psalm 16 Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.  I say to the Lord, "You are my Lord; I have no god apart from you." 

Proverbs 3:27-32  Verse 27 says do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it.  Do not say to your neighbor, "Go and come again tomorrow I will give it" when you have it with you.  Do not contend  with a man for no reason, when he has done you no harm.  Do not envy a man of violence and do not choose any of his ways, for the devious person is an abomination to the Lord, but the upright are in his confidence. 

Jeff has worked so hard under several leaders that allow him to go no where.  I want him to be seen and appreciated!  But the risk is he could loose his job and then we would be in a worse situation.  Again, I have to go back to Proverbs 3: 5 & 6 where I must trust in the Lord with all my heart and lean NOT unto my own understand, but in all OUR WAYS acknowledge HIM and HE will direct our paths.  He knows what is going on.  He has a plan ... I just have to trust and have faith.  Jeff is much better at this than I.  He appreciates where he is no matter if it is cleaning toilets, working in an office, as a automobile repossor, etc.  He has always done whatever job God has given him.  He does it to the best of his ability as God commands.  He amazes me how very humble he is.  I am so blessed to have him as the father of our children.  What an amazing example he is to them and me in my weakness.  Colossians 3: 23 makes me think of Jeff .. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward.  You are serving the Lord Christ.  For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.  Thank you Lord for that promise.  You have things under control and you know what has happened to your child.  He continues to serve you as you require!

In the YouVersion fearless Bible study today the topic is Lord I am weak!  How appropriate.  Matthew 5:1-12 talks about what I was just blogging.  Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him.  And he opened his mouth and taught them says, "blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.  Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.  blessed are the meek, for they shall in herit the earth.  blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.  blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.  Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.  Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.  Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness sake for theirs is the kingdome of heaven.  blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account.  Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. 

Wow, God says clearly here that those who are poor in spirit, who mourn, who are merciful, pure in heart, peacemakers, who are persecuted for righteousness ... then you will be BLESSED.  You will be comforted!  God knows all our fears and He is with us.  Matthew 5:3 speaks about the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdome of heaven.  It is when we feel as thugh we have nothing and are nothing that God is able to be EVERYTHING to us and He is glorified.  I need to ask Him to help me understand my wekaness and my poverty and to feat upon Him. 

Help me Lord be content where we are.  Help me to just trust in You and not question why we are where we are.  Help me not worry and thank you so much for putting the most amazing people in our lives.  Help us show your LOVE in all that we do and say! 

Have a wonderful Friday!  God bless. 

January 20, 2013

Happy Sunday morning.  Wow, today is a beautiful Sunday morning.  However, satan got involved and made the morning preparations rough as usual.  Jeff and I had a little problem getting ready to head out.  I was running late, I needed the back seat in the van put in and I was preparing to sing and needed to be there on time.  So, I picked up Leah and Lawrence and then headed to Church.  After I arrived to Church I sent Jeff a text apologizing for my behavior earlier that morning.  I had been preparing to sing Completely for my special but last night it just didn't come together.  I felt led to sing Blessings instead.  As Church began and people offered up testimonies and prayer requests I quickly realized that God was in the leading of what song I was to sing.  Jeff was so sweet and recorded my song.  I had a very hard time not crying.  I was thinking about those we had lost that week.  People like Susan Bannon, Richard Wayman and Beth Johnston.  I was also thinking about Grandpa and Grandma Zinn with their major health issues and all that has changed for them.  He has been diagnosed with major cancer, she has been put into a nursing home and life seems to be coming to its end for them.  My heart breaks thinking that they might be leaving this earth sometime in the near future. 

My Bible study today was what are the worthless things of the world that have a pull on you?  What are the good things that are replacing the best things?  What is most important?  Things of the earth are NOT at all important.  The study spoke about what are you afraid of losing in this world in order to gain what is eternal?  It all goes along with all that was happening today.  After leaving Church I went to Jennnifer Stuckey's baby shower... new life.  I have to admit I often feel like I wish I could go back to that phase of my life.  However, there were a lot of trials and struggles then too.  So, I am happy where I am.

Matthew 5:3-6 Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.  Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.  Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth.  Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. 
II Corinthians 12: 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Galatians 4:9 But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more? 
II Timothy 3:3-9 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.  Avoid such people.  For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth.  Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men corrupted in mind and disqualified regarding the faith.  But they will not get very far, for their folly will be plain to all, as was that of those two men. 
I John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 

And then Galatians chapter 5 talks about how Christ has set us free.  Verse 1 reads for freedom Christ has set us free; stand FIRM therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.  In our freedom we are to serve and love one another!  This does not give us freedom in the flesh to act crazy and sin!!!  We are to walk in the spirit according to verse 16.  If we walk in the spirit we won't want to live in the flesh because the flesh and the spirit don't like each other.  In verses 22 - 23 details the fruits of the spirit!  In verse 25 it says, If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.  Let us not become coneited, provoking one another, envying one another. 

Why is it so hard to realize that we are God's children!  He loves us.  He gives us boundaries for our good, as we do for our children.  His Word speaks clearly to us even in today's time.  There are so many forms of media to help us understand God's Word even more clearly.  As I have mentioned earlier, I am thoroughly enjoying my YouVersion on my smart phone, doing my daily Fearless devotion.  And I am really enjoying Daily Audio Bible as well. 

Matthew 13: 24- 46 speaks of two parables give to us so that we may understand.  First Jesus speaks of the parable of weeds and the second spoke of the mustard seed and the leaven.  Jesus spoke to the crowds in parables so we might understand things better.  The visual aids that we often look to today.  I love the parables, I love how clearly Jesus makes what He is saying to us so that everyone will understand and remember clearly.

Psalms 18:1-15 This scripture speaks of how the Lord is my rock and my fortress.  I love you, Oh Lord, my strength.  The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies. 

Proverbs 4: 1-6 Hear, O sons, a father's instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, for I give you good precepts; do not forsake my teaching. 

In all these scriptures God is making all things so clear.  Jesus teaches us with visual aids so we can understand clearly.  Then in Psalms the Lord clearly states that he is our rock and fortress.  He is our deliverer whom we can take refuge.  He is our shield and our protector.  He is worthy of all our praise!

Then in Proverbs He explains that we need to listen when He corrects us.  He is trying to teach us something.  Instead of getting upset we should listen when He corrects us so we can learn something. 

I think I understand that I need to look for the lesson in all that is happening around me.  Everything is done for God's good.  He has a plan.  I don't understand the plan but I need to be submissive to it, when I am corrected I need to be submissive and learn from it.  In all, He is worthy to be praised!

Thank you Lord for loving and correcting me.  Thank you for making scripture come to life.  Thank you for being my shield, for standing in front of me and all around me even when I run out in traffic as a silly child unaware of the dangers around me.  Sometimes I fall down and skin my knee.  But you still love me and pick me up.  Explain why I am in time out for running away and then hugging me and loving me no matter what I do!  I will learn from you Lord.  I am trying so hard to do your will in everything I do!  I love you Lord!  I have the promise of Heaven and eternal life.  Thank you ... I will wait on you.  I will continue to follow you. 

January 19, 2013

Today is a beautiful Saturday.  Jannine has her best friend in the world here, Izabella Ferjiani.  She is staying with us until Monday while her parents are moving their final items to Florida to stay in Englewood where they belong.  I am so happy to have Debbie and her family back home with us.  I missed her for the four years she was gone.  I feel settled again to know she is here.  I am thankful that God allowed us to stay as well.  He has a plan.  I like his plan!  We are surrounded by some wonderful people.  This afternoon Jannine and Izabella are going to their friend Jessica's house for a few hours to play.  Jeff and I are going to go to a movie and early dinner while they are there.  We have some gift certificates from Christmas we are going to get to use!  Yipee!

Today in my Daily Audio Bible study I learned about the parable of the sower.  He talks about a man's heart and if it is hard or open to trust and learn from God.  The Bible tells stories about what is going on in a certain time written, however, these situations are still applicable to todays world and time.  God still speaks to us in our hearts today through what is written in the Bible.  That is why we call the scriptures alive!  You can read the same verse at various times and get a different meaning to you personally each time according to what is happening around us.  The seeds are planted ... but in what type of situation.  Is it on a hard rock that can't attach?  When the wind blows suddenly the seed or the "FAITH" blows away quickly.  Is the seed in sand?  When the wind blows it might stick around for a little bit, but when the water comes up does the seed wash away again?  This person wants to believe!  They want to hang on ... but the worry and crisis take over and pull you away.  Or, are we on solid and rich soil?  Are the roots dug down deep, watered well and staying hold no matter what happens in life?  I hope and pray that my seed is in good soil.  Listening to Daily Audio Bible and reading my YouVersion studies on my phone are helping me dig deeper!  I want to bare fruit!  I want to show God's love and goodness in my life even when times are tough.  Matthew 13: 1 - 23 talks about these parables.  I don't want the devil to take away my faith.  I won't let him take it away.  I will hold fast to God's Word.  I will walk the walk and live the leading of God!  I know at times I have been the person with no faith and trying to fix the problem on my own.  But I am trying to be the soil that is rich and holds firm with my roots to God's leading.    We also read Psalm 17 and Proverbs 3: 33-35.

My daily verse is I John 5:1 Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who lves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. Phillipians 2: 5 - 8 speaks of how Jesus took the form of a man and became a man.  `When our hearts are clinging to things other than the Lord, we are inclined to be much more fearful.  Help me Lord to cling to YOU and YOU alone! 

January 17, 2013

Another beautiful morning here in sunny Florida.  We were all moving a little slow today.  David, Daniel and Lauren went to Disney in Orlando yesterday and got home around 11:30pm last night.  So we all rested a little today.  Tonight is the retirement party for Dan Jeffers.  He was the LBHS Principal from 1980 - 2013... he is an amazing man and fantatsic leader.  LBHS will miss him but Bob Bedford is taking over starting tomorrow and will do a great job I have no doubt. 

At the Parent Association meeting and SAC meeting at LBHS last night I learned that Beth Johnson went home to be with the Lord on Tuesday January 15, 2013.  Wow, three people that I personally knew passed away in one day in a matter of 12 hours.  So many changes are happening all around me.  It's hard to change.  It's hard to see things become different.  The school building is being torn down and a new one is being put up, our principal is changing, many employees at LBHS and Myakka River are retiring and new people are coming in.  Constant change ... it's hard to take sometimes.  The Bible talks about seasons of change... it's hard but exciting all at the same time. 

Matthew 12: 1-21
We are to do good even on the Sabbath.  Verse 18 Here is my servant whom I have chosen, the one I love, in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him, and he will proclaim justice to the nations.  He will not quarrel or cry out; no one will hear his voice in the streets.A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out, till he leads justice to victory.  In his name the nations will put their hope. 

Psalm 15 is filled with promises.  Lord, who may dwell in your sanctuary?  Who may live on your holy hill?  He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong and casts no slur on his fellowman, who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the Lord, who keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends his money without usury and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.  HE WHO DOES THESE THINGS WILL NEVER BE SHAKEN!  I love that.  Just do God's will, stay close to Him and you will be fine.  Nothing can hurt you. 

Provers 3: 21 - 26 speaks about walking with God.  We need to completely trust in Him and only Him!  Verse 21 says My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck.  Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble; when you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.  Have no fear of SUDDEN DISASTER or of the RUIN that overtakes the wicketd, for the Lord will be your CONFIDENCE and will KEEP YOUR FOOT FROM BEING SNARED!  I love that.  He will completely protect us ... He loves us!

God puts boundaries, clear boundaries around us just like we do for our children.  There are concesquences for our actions if we do not stay within those boundaries.  But we should LOVE the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind and body so that we don't look at the boundaries as limitations but instead as protection. 

I am so thankful for all that God has done for me.  I am so thankful for the Daily Audio Bible and my Bible study through YouVersion.  It makes it so much easier for me to stay in God's word.  I am loving my new years resolution to get more into God's word.  Just on day 17 I feel so much closer to the Lord.  I feel so blessed.  I have so much peace.  I feel so calm.  I have been able to sleep better at night.  God is blessing even in the little things.  For example, last night, Jannine couldn't find her little ipod.  We stopped and prayed and ask God to help us find it.  That certainly wasn't a life changing issue, it wasn't that important, but Jannine was upset and wanted to find it.  She was crying.  So we prayed.  Just in about two minutes I felt the need to look under her mattress where we had already looked.  And praise the Lord, there it was.  Even in the little things He is there.

My YouVersion verse of the day today is Psalm 103:13 As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear Him.  We are only human and we are weak.  Psalm 103 says Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name!  (That is an awesome song as well as verse)  Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your inquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.  The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppresed. Verse 10 says, He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities.  For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.  As a father shows compassion to his children so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. 

I am so glad that I am a child of the King.  Have a great day.  Enjoy the blessing of God even in the little things.

January 16, 2013

Yesterday was filled with sadness, yet celebration.  A dear friend of mine, Gina Bannan, posted on facebook that her Mom had gone home to Heaven at 2:33am.  Sad for those here left behind but a celebration for Susan as she is now with Jesus.  She is no longer in pain!  Susan was a tiny woman who did great things for the Englewood community.  I reflect back on the many school events she attended always cheering the kids on and loving all who approached her.  She had an amazing outreach to the homeless in our community.  She is now resting in the arms of Jesus.  And I am sure God is saying, "Well done though good and faithful servant... well done."

As the day went on I continued to do my housewife and mother duties.  Then around 3:30pm I headed to Myakka to pick Jannine and Jessica Blalock up from school.  On the way I received a call from Heather Wayman.  She was crying and shared that Richie had passed.  I could hear the kids crying in the background.  My heart aches for them.  We confirmed that Richie was ready to go to Heaven so we rejoice in that fact. 

I have been with people a few times when they died.  My immediate thought even my Mom died was... wow... I was just with them and now they are with Jesus!  I feel so close to God during those times.  When my cousin died I asked her to take a message to my Mom, Dad, Grandparents and Aunt.  I wonder if they are able to really do that.  That is another mystery bag question my Dad used to tell me about. 

Last night Jeff and I attended a meeting for EAA Chapter 180.  There has been a great deal of fighting going on amongst the chapter board members.  I was able to stay quiet and just listen with a great deal of direction from Jeff.  I was nominated as the board secretary.  It has been an experience to be part of this group and learn the inner workings when there have been issues. 

While listening to the Daily Audio Bible Brian read Matthew 11 and verses 28-30 just jumped out at me.  It says, "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."  Why do I resist God so much?  If I would just relax, take the yoke, and let HIM lead the burderns would be less.  When will I ever learn to just let go?  Psalm 14: 1 -7 talks about the fools!  They say that there is NO GOD!  The are bad people and they do horrible things.  I don't want to be an evil doer!  I want to follow God and GOD ALONE!

Isaiah 45:5 says clearly I AM THE LORD, and there is NO other, besides me there is no GOD; I equip you, though you do not know me.  So I ask myself what the Lord wants me to do with all I am learning.  What do I need to change in the way that I act, think, respond, schedule my time.  When I make decisions I need to stop and ask myself if this is truth or just a feeling or my plan.  Is it the Lord or is it ME?  I have to chose who I am going to serve.  Joshua 24:15 says And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell.  But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!

Last night we got a call from a Denise Tucker.  She is the new owner of our 10151 Charlemont Avenue home.  She was served paperwork regarding our lot next door.  She said there are $3,330 in back taxes on it and then she wants to give us $500 on top to purchase it.  Wow, I never thought we would see anything from that property every again.  There is another direction in God's leading helping us out.  The auction is in March so we will work to get all of this resolved in the mean time.  Thank you Lord for yet another blessing from YOU!

January 15, 2013

Good morning.  I was unable to post anything yesterday so I will write for both yesterday and now today.  It is a beautiful Tuesday morning here in sunny (80) degree weather.

Today my daily audio Bible covered a wonderful book Matthew 10: 24 - 11: 6.  What a power group of scriptures.  It speaks about having no fear!  Have no fear of them, for nothing is covered that will nto be revealed, or hidden that will not be know.  What I tell you in the dark, say in the light, and what you hear whipsred, proclaim on the housetops.  Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul.  Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.  And my favorite part is in verse is 29 where He says, are not two sparrows sold for a penny?  And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father.  But even the hairs of your heard are all numbered.  Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparros.  So everyone who acknowldeges me before men, I will also acknoledge before my Father who is in heaven. Nothing is a surprise to Him!  He knows everything.  Even if we lose our lives, nothing can take us away from HIM!  But he expects all or nothing!  We have to be all in and completely have faith and believe in Him. 

He explains that following Him will not be easy.  Time will be tough!  Families will be against each other for following Christ.  But it is all worth it for our eternal rewards... eternal LIFE! 

I love my children but do not know how many hairs are on their head.  My Father loves me so much and knows me so well that He knows how many hairs are on my head.  He loves me ... He cherrishes me ... so what do I have to fear?  He will take care of my every need.  That is where there is often confusion.  He doesn't take care of my every want, but every need!  That is what He promises.  In doing that He gives me more than I want and ever deserve.  He has the WHOLE WORLD in His hands!  I remember singing that song as a child and visualizing His hands holding the world.  That is so awesome to know. 

We have a free will.  We can do whatever we want.  However we must realize that we are not GOD!  We can do what we want, we can make all the plans.  BUT, if God is in control He will make it all work out for His glory.  It doesn not work when you are the soverighn Lord of your universe.  In exchange for all that you are, I will give you all that I AM!  I will give you the life you are seaking.  It's not going to look like you thought.  It's not all about your comfort, it's not all about your wealth, it's not all about your health and well being, it's not all there is to life!  Life eternal is about becoming the person you were made to be!  It's about  growing an ever deeper relationship with God!  It's about knowing that even if you lose your life nothing can seperate you from GOD! 

Lord, I commit to be ALL IN with you.  I will give you all or nothing in 2013.  I know I won't be perfect.  I know I will fall and make mistakes.  I ask You to help me in my walk with You.  I pray Lord that I have my heart open to follow Your leading and direction each and every day.  Thank you for all You do for me and my family.  Thank You for Your protection each and every day.  I want to leave the chaos and live in peace, love and compassion with You under your direction.  Thank you Jesus ... Amen!

When I woke this morning I read a post from a dear childhood friend Gina Bannon.  Her precious Mother Susan went home to Heaven today at 2:33am.  We are sad here on earth but celebrate in her victory now being with Jesus.  In my devotion I came across these verses that remind me of her. 
Proverbs 3: 16 -18 Long life is her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor.  Her ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace.  She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her; those who hold her fast are called blessed.  These verses make me think of her.  She was an amazing woman who loved the Lord and showed His love and compassion in everything she did.  She loved people and did whatever God allowed her to do to help people spiritually and physically with their needs.  Our loss is certainly Heaven's gain.  I pray that I may be able to show God's love in what I do much like she did.

In my Bible study, Fearless... the topic was Lord, are you in the storm?  Isaiah 45:5 says I am the Lord, and there is no other, besides me there is no God; I equip you, though you do not know me.  I read about how my thoughts, my feelings, and my beliefs line up with God's word.  I have been struggling with fears about my disability case, our home situation, our finances, etc.  So many uncertainties!  Today I am realizing that God really does love me.  He is in control.  He knows what is going on in my life and hasn't forgotten me.  He never says oops.  He is never caught off guard. 

So, as I start my day and go forward with the duties before me I go knowing that God is in control.  He will walk before me, beside me and behind me surrounding me with His protection and peace as long as I allow Him to be in control.  Proverbs 3: 5 & 6 is still my favorite verse.  I do trust in Him and I am allowing Him to lead my path, not questioning what is going to happen but preparing to do His will even if it isn't always what I want or think it should be.

It's going to be a wonderful day!  <3

January 13, 2013

Happy Sunday! 

Today my day started out going to Church at Fellowship Bible Church.  Pastor John Meyer gave us a wonderful message. 

Today I am just getting to my Bible study at 6:30pm.  Ephesians 1:11 says In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will.  My study talked about a question that I often ask.  How long Lord?  Is this necessary Lord?  Will I ever overcome?  Those are all questions that I frequently ask.  I have to admit that I have cried out and maybe even screamed alone in the house asking God why?  With all we have been through over the last few years... it's been tough.  We lost our home unexpectedly in September 2010 to foreclosure.  We were current on our payments from the mortgage modification and came home one night to locked doors!  But, praise God that same day Steve and Amy Leonard were moving and asked if we could watch their home.  We asked if we could move in and they agreed.  Praise the Lord for His perfect timing.  I have been fighting for disability since April 1, 2011.  It has been such a struggle.  However, just Wednesday January 9, 2013 I had my day in court.  We don't know for sure if I was awarded the disability, but it looks pretty good right now.

God always has perfect timing.  Acts 4:29-31 is a perfect prayer during these times.  No matter the outcome and no matter how frightened I feel, no matter how things appear, I will walk forward in the Spirit by faith, fearlessly!  I have to ask Him to do what only He can do, but also ask Him to help me do what I must do which is LIVE BY FAITH NOT FEAR!!!! 

Deuteronomy 32:39 says, see now that I, even I, am he, and there is no God beside me; I kill and I make alive; I wound and I heal; and there is none that can deliver out of my hand.

Today I stopped in a visited Leah and Larence's family.  Richie is dying.  He can hardly breathe.  He can't really speak very well.  I tries to smile but he struggles for every breath.  He may not be here tomorrow.  Heather is so sad.  I feel for her.  As I drove home alone I was thinking about all the funny moments we had at the bus stop.  He used to always goof around with the kids stepping on their toes and making them laugh while we waited for the bus.  Now, that time will be gone.  I didn't appreciate those silly moments enough.  Cancer has taken over his body.  It's hard to see him suffer.  It's hard to see Heather and the kids cry.  He has been a good man to them.  All I can do is pray and ask God to ease his pain and take him home.  We confirmed that he knows the Lord and is ready for glory.  I can't imagine what that time in your life feels like.  At Christmas we came by and sang carols and blessed there family with gifts, food and money.  What an honor to be part of that time.  It was a blessing to me ... as we blessed them! 

God has everything under control.  I just need to keep myself under control and TRUST!  Proverbs 3: 5 & 6 is my favorite verse and so appropriate for today's study.  Thank you God!  I love you and I trust you.

January 11, 2013

Happy Friday!

Today's Bible study started with Matthew 5: 43-45.  You have heard that it was said, "You shall llove your neighbor and hate your eney."  But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven.  For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.

Lord are you in the storm?  I learned that no matter if a situation is good or bad we are to be joyful.  Ecclesiastes 7: 13-14.  Isaiah 45: 7 explains that God forms the light and creates darknesss.  I make well-being and create calamity, I am the Lord,w ho oes all these things. 

I learned that God is in complete control.  In Deuteronomy 32:39 it says that See now that I, even I, am he, and there is no God beside me; I kill and I make alive; I wound and I heal; and there is none that can deliver out of my hand.

I am thankful that God loves and that He controls everything.  I am one blessed girl. 

January 10, 2013

Happy Thursday!  Today I went to the Myakka River Elementary to be with Jannine for the Family Resource Center.  I enjoyed meeting the therapy dogs they brought in.  After the kids went back to class I had the opportunity to speak with Angie Kopp.  She turned on the Joy FM 88.1FM on her radio so I quickly realized that she was a Christian.

Now I am trying to get my homework done and getting the laundry caught up. 

It was a great day.  I appreciate all the blessings God has given our family. 

More tomorrow.

January 9, 2013

January 9, 2013

So, today was a very big day in the Walston household.  Today was my disability hearing.  David had the day off so we drove together.  I have to say as much as I have been trying not to worry, I was VERY nervous.  I listened to my daily audio Bible and read my fearless devotion on YouVersion on my phone.  I have been trying to remind myself that God is in control as I panic driving over the skyway bridge.  Although while on top of the bridge I looked out at a new perspective.  From on top of this beautiful bridge I could see for miles in all directions.  All the beautiful things that God created were all around me.  It was a beautiful sunny day.  The weather was absolutely perfect!  Why should I fear?  My Father created all of this.  Why should I be worried?  Why should I fear? 

As I entered the conference area I was soon introduced to my attorney Michael Egilton.  He was very nice and only 28 years old.  We discussed my account in detail while waiting for the judge.  I was called back to go before the judge.  I was filled with peace and calm as  I walked in.  We were before the judge for about 40 minutes.  I was asked a few questions by the judge and answered them truthfully.  When we were done the judge immediately closed the case and left the room.  I didn't know whether to cry or celebrate.  The attorney and I went back to another conference room to discuss what had just happened.  The attorney informed me that there was so need to keep running after we had already crossed the finish line in first place.  We went over some details of when I will get a confirmed ruling and when the money might begin and how much.  Nothing is for certain, but at least it gave me a ball park idea.  I was told that for the first 5 months social security pays nothing.  So, my case started April 2011 so nothing was considered until September 1, 2011.  For 2011 I would be given $820 per month.  All of 2012 I would be given $850 per month.  And in 2013 I would receive about $900 per month.  These are all cost of living raises.  I will be given the direct deposit the 3rd Wednesday of each month.  The first payment will be for all the past I didn't receive.  Freedom Disability will receive a little over $4,000 for their services.  

After we left court David and I drove back to Sarasota and had lunch at Olive Garden to celebrate!  I love spending time with him and getting to know more as an adult.  I can't believe that my baby boy is all grown up.  I am honored he is still home with us and I cherrish every minute I get to spend with him.

I dropped him off at Laurens then headed back to the house to grab a few minutes with Jannine and Daniel before leaving again to go to Sarasota for the EAA Chapter 180 board meeting.  What an interesting group of strong willed spoiled men I was listening too.  It reminded me of when the boys were little and would fight at times.

Then my precious husband and I grabbed a romantic bite at McDonalds then headed home to crash after a very long day!

All in all it was a great day.  Thank you Lord for taking care of my family once again!  I love you.  I will continue to trust in you and rest in your love knowing you are in charge and will do what is best for me and my family.  I love you Lord.

January 7, 2013

Good morning.  Today was the first day back to school.  It is almost 9am and Daniel and Jannine are off to school.  David stayed up all night so he just went to sleep and I need to get ready to go to the doctor at 10am. 

My devotion today was again about the disciples in the boat.  I can't believe that even though they knew Jesus personally how unsure they were about his power.  It amazes me and also helps me in some weird ways.  I have a hard time trusting at times and hey I have never met him face to face like the disciples.  I just need to have more faith! 

My devotion spoke that the most important commandment in Mark  12 verse 30 says we are to love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.  The second MOST important commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself!  Wow, I need to remember that when driving down the road and in the grocery store!  AND on the phone with a bill collector!  Boy do I have a lot of work to do on that commandment. 

Well, it is a rainy day here in Florida today but I am going to get ready for my doctor appointment.  Then back home to work on my school work.  Let the 2013 schedule begin!

January 8, 2013

So, today was a very busy but good day.  I was trying to rest but of course other stuff happened and I didn't get to rest much.

My devotion was amazing again today.  Everything in both my fearless plan and my daily audio Bible reading both reminded me that God is in control and that I should not worry. 

Tomorrow is my disability hearing at 10:30am.  David is taking me to Clearwater.  I am trying so hard NOT to be nervouse.  I am trying so hard NOT to worry.  But I am both unfortunately.  I am asking God to forgive me for my fears.  I am praying for peace.  I know God has this all figured out no matter what happens.  I am just praying for favor.

So, until tomorrow...fears be gone!!!!  Thank you God for always taking care of me.  Proverbs 3: 5 & 6

January 6, 2013

Today was another wonderful day.  We started the day out in Church.  We had a missionary visit from Nicaragua.  They shared about all the churches they have been able to start and all the lives that they have been able to lead to the Lord.  What an amazing opportunity to be part of.  Trust me, I am not saying that I want to go on the mission field but I love hearing about those who do. 

Yesterday I watched a movie about a teacher and parent who wanted better schools for their children.  One of the quotes in the movie was, "We have to be the change we want to see."  I try to teach my children that if they see a problem in the world, to be part of the solution!  We as Christians need to make a difference.  We are missionaries in the communities in which we live and work. 

My devotion was still talking about the disciples in the boat and how they were so frightened being in the middle of the storm, out of control, getting nowhere!  Then Jesus walked on the water and calmed the seas! Lighthouses are one of my favorite things in the world.  I love how it makes me think about Jesus.  No matter how bad the weather is that lighthouse stands tall and firm and lights our way just like God does.  Keep your focus on Him, don't live in fear and keep doing the right things and you will be okay. 

Today in Church Heather, Richie, Lawrence and Leah were there.  It was good to see them.  I feel terrible because I didn't get to actually speak to them.  Richie doesn't have much time left.  I don't know if he knows the Lord.  We need to get to him before it is too late.  Jim Zinn just found out that he has cancer all over his body.  How much time does he have left.  He fell and broke his arm while trying to pick up his wife Joanne.  So there lives have been completely tossed around.  She is now in a nursing home and never going back to the house.  They will never live together again.  How much time do they have left?  How do you handle that time of your life?  It makes me sad to think that there time is so short.  But, we are NEVER promised tomorrow are we?  So we should make every moment count!  Make a difference in the world.  Be the missionary where we live.  Live by faith ... and show others what it means to be a Christian! 

Have a great day!

January 5, 2013

Today is Saturday.  The first weekend of the new year.  It has been really nice week.  I have been trying to get things organized.  I am getting our finances in order.  I am preparing for my court case on Wednesday.  I have been trying to get the house in order as well.  It feels good to be organized.  I have big goals this year.  I want to loose 50 pounds by July for Chrisy and Rob's wedding.  I want to be healthier.  I want 2013 to be an amazing year.  But most importanly I want to be in line with God's will and be a good wife and mother to my family.

Today in my devotion I learned that on day four of the men being out of control in the boat, Jesus walked towards them on the sea!  That had to be an amazing thing to witness.  It talked about how sometimes we get so upset in our circumstances that we have a hard time seeing God at work in the midst of the situation.  This happens a lot when the situation goes on and on.  I feel like that right now.  Our lives have been in turmoil for SEVERAL years now (about 6).  Jeff's job at Quest fell apart and he has gone from job to job trying to provide for us.  And even now in his job, he loves it, but there are no opportunities to make more money or advance.  He can do so much more than he does and he is not appreciated or acknowledged for the amazing and talented man he is. 

My devotion reminded that do we truly know that God is in control and do we believe that at all times?  Do we loose our focus?  I know I do!  Psalm 46:10 says to "Be still, and know that I am God."  It is hard to rest in the truth of God's word when life isn't going well.  When you feel like life is out of control how to you rest and have faith?  John 16:33 says "In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world."

Why do we fix our eyes on the troubles and not on God.  Peter cried out, "Lord, save me." Matthew 14:30 says, "But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." 

In John 15 talks about Jesus is the true vine.  It says that every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.  It talks about that we have to be part of the vine in order to survive.  I believe you have to read God's Word and build a relationship with God so we can be filled and grow and do His will.  If you are not growing and bearing fruit then what good are you to God?  He doesn't need us if we aren't growing...He will throw us away.  God wants us to be joyful and happy and productive.  We are to love one another as Christ loves us.  He says we are His friends if we do what He commands us to do.  We aren't His servants we are His friends, his children.  He chose us and appointed us that we should go and bear fruit and that our fruit should abide, so that whatever we ask the Father in His name, He may give it to you. 

We know that the world doesn't like us.  They didn't like Christ, so why should we be any different?  If we were like the world, they would love us!  Misery loves company. 

Psalm 119:14 says, In the way of your testimonies I delight as much as in all riches.  As a parent, I am thrilled when my children do well.  That is how God feels about us.  We are to study His work, listen to His will and direction for our lives, love one another and remember we are here to make a difference in the world.  We are not to worry about anything because we are to remember that God is in control and He is in charge.  We are to just love and trust!

  I saw this today on Facebook and just had to include this on my blog.  I love it!

I am looking forward to having a wonderful and restful day today with the kids and maybe even getting more organizing done in the mean time.

January 4, 2013

Today I got up early and left at 8:30am to ride out to Boca Grande with Liz and William.  (Liz Delpain) She is beginning a new job and needed me to sit in the car with William.  I continued my Bible study today and it basically reviewed what I learned today. 

We discussed the wind and the waves again in Matthew 14:22-33.  The discimples were in a terrible and scary situation.  The waves were crashing on the boat, the storm was raging around them.  They were frightened.  They thought they might not survive.  They lost their focus on God.  They just knew everything was literally crashing around them and they were not getting anywhere.  I was reminded to read Psalm 46 again and learned how the Psalmist was reminding us that God is our refuge and our strength.  We should not fear!  The Psalmist also reminded us that when the nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters His voice, and the earth melts!  That is the power our God has!  He controls the world and EVERYTHING within it! 

This is our Father!  He loves us.  So why do we fear?  We should not worry.  We should have a strong faith in God, we should trust Him and relax knowing He is in control.

I try to remind myself of this daily.  It is a hard lesson to learn but I am trying REALLY hard! 

It was a nice day.  But I am not feeling really well today so I am going to try and rest for a while and remember what I learned today!

January 3, 2013

Day 3 of my new years resolution.  Last night Izabella and Sofia Ferjiani spent the night.  I love having three little girls running around the house.  I enjoy hearing their laughter and listening to their "serious" conversations.  I love it that Jannine and Izabella have been best friends since they were only 2 years old.  Izabella moved away for 4 years and moved back over the summer.  There friendship has just picked up right where they left off.  I pray this bound will continue throughout their lifetime. 

This takes me to my devotion today.  We certainly did not understand why the Ferjiani family had to move away for 4 years.  I still don't know why but certainly know I cherrish their friendship even more now.  Debbie is like a sister to me.  I just love her so much.  I am so glad that she is back to stay.  They just closed on a house last week in Rotonda. 

My devotion spoke of when the disciples were out in the boat and sent into a storm.  Why did God do that?  They were so afraid and didn't feel like he was there at all with them.  For the last few years I have felt like we were sent out into a storm and I don't understand why.  Certainly there have been breaks in the storm and I am thankful for the rainbows I experience frequently but I often wonder why were are still in this uncertain and crazy storm.  In Matthew 14: 31 - 33 it says, Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him saying "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"  And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased.  And those in the obat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God." 

The devotion today had me read Psalm 40.  It talks about how God picked me up and put my feet firmly upon a rock making my steps secure.  He put a new song in my mouth.  Verse 4 says, Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not turn to the proud, to those who go astray after a lie!  Verse 8 "I delight to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart."  That is one of my goals for 2013.  I want to stay in God's will. 

I will work hard to remember that God is here for me and He controls every part of my life.  I need to be a willing vessel to follow Him and do His will. 

So today, I will continue to listen to the girls play.  My friend Chrissy Cremeens is coming over so we can plan her wedding and it is going to be a fun time of friendship and fellowship today.  Thank you Lord for another wonderful day to enjoy.

January 2, 2013

Day two of the new year and God's plans for our family.

As I read my devotion this morning I learned that mahy people are living in fear including myself.  I often think that God might need to reach me a lesson the hard way because I'm so stubborn.  I always lay out the plan and have it already for God to take care of which is the wrong way to do things. 

I am facing my disability hearing next week.  I have to admit I am fearful.  I don't know what our family will do if the disability does not go through.  I know God has everything under control, but yet I worry.  Psalms 46 talks about God being our fortress.  Psalm 46:1 says, God is our refuge and strength a very present help in a time of trouble.  Verse 2 says, that even though the world is crumbling around us we should not fear because God is with us.  He will take care of us.  He will hold us together and keep us safe.  Verse 9 explans that when God speaks He makes wars cease.  Earlier in the chapter it states that That nations rage, the kingdoms totter; He utters His voice ad the earth melts.  And finally in verse 10 the Bible clearly states, "BE STILL, and know that I AM GOD.  I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!" 

I know personally I even worry that because I worry and don't completely trust Him or I have a moment where I cry out and ask WHY that maybe God isn't blessing because of my lack of faith.  Don't get me wrong, even in my moments of unbelief I am still so very thankful for all He has done.  Why doesn't the power of what He has already done overtake my lack of faith?  Is that a defect in me?  When I share my concerns with my husband he gets up set because he doesn't want God to think we don't appreciate what He has already done for us.  I can certainly see his point of view.  I feel guilty when I have this lack of faith. 

So, today I am going to remind myself that GOD IS IN CONTROL.  Deuteronomy 6:5 says,  "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind."  And I do love the Lord with all my heart, soul and mind.  I know my Father loves me as well.  I know He will take care of me... He always does.  I believe that 2013 will be a year of amazing blessings.  I pray I will continue to keep my focus on Him no matter what each day brings.  We are not promised tomorrow, so I am thankful for TODAY.